Multi-Time Zonal Birthday Fun

It’s no coincidence that if you add ‘c’, ‘h’, ‘e’ and ‘s’ to MUNI (San Francisco’s Municipal Railway) you get ‘munchies’.  And boy, didn’t my poor mother witness her fair share while visiting our new city…

For reason’s unbeknownst to our family, my mother is an magnet for the illicit.  If there is something unsavoury, illegal or weird occurring on any street, in any city, in the entire world, it will occur 2 metres away from my mother. Move over Murphy. This is #MarysLaw.

This all began about 15 years ago while walking with my father and friends from a theatre performance in the CBD to their car. A young hoodlum approached Mary (and not the large Mediterranean men she was walking with) & asked whether she had ‘any gear’. Those of you who know my mother are either guffawing, snorting out their coffee or assume that I’m embellishing. Nope. True story. Just ask her… If you can get past the 3 large Colombian bodyguards and armoured vehicle, that is. (Kidding, mum!)

For those who haven’t had the ultimate pleasure of making Mary’s acquaintance, let’s just ‘possessing gear’ would be about the last thing my mother would ever do, seeing as she doesn’t even take Nurofen.

Mary’s introduction to the UK involved a cab ride through the back streets of London with the Welcome Bonus of witnessing a drug deal. And then arriving here, of course she had to witness the one hippie with large enough cojones to light up some wacky-tobaccy in front of the SFPD.  What’d I tell you? #MarysLaw

Shady SF aside, mum enjoyed being reunited with George & a Nespresso machine. Not necessarily in that order. (Again, kidding. But the coffee here is pretty appalling, so you never know…).

But most importantly, brunch! All it took was booking a table 4 weeks in advance, a 45 minute wait and accepting that SF’s best weekend brunch restaurant, nopa SF only opens at 11am. But the Custard French Toast was out of this world, so I swallowed my inner-Melbournite rage – along with my delicious toast. Food-babies nestled comfortably out of the camera’s range, we snapped a quick selfie with Alamo Square Park’s Painted Ladies (a.k.a The Full House houses) and Karl The Fog.

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With nary a John Stamos in sight, we continued our road-trip to Silicon Valley. Nerds united at Apple HQ, eBay, Facebook & Google – where, thanks to a young software engineer visiting with his mates, we managed to sneak into the closed Google Visitor Centre to play with all sorts of fun Google gear & test out the famed nap-pods.

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Also, in honour of today apparently being National Doughnut Day, let’s pay homage to all that is delicious in the world with the Android Statue Garden:

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Our picturesque drive through Stanford on the way home almost made me want to swing a little (okay, a lot) to the Right so that I could comfortably attend this breath-taking establishing but let’s be honest, they’d sense a disturbance in the Force the minute I set foot near that sandstone…

After a much-needed late start on Sunday, the Napa Valley awaited us. I could get used to seafood brunches overlooking the mountainous winery regions of Yountville.

If Napa is on your bucket list, do it. If it’s not, add it. And while you’re at it, head to Sonoma County for equally-delicious wine but significantly less tourists. Good luck with finding someone to be designated driver though!

On Monday, George had to resume his responsibilities as the sole gainfully-employed member of the household while I got to relish in funemployment and my continued passion for travel itineraries & tour-guiding. Alcatraz (we escaped!), Fisherman’s Wharf, the seals at Pier 39 & Ghirardelli Square awaited. Clearly not having learnt anything about pacing, we surpassed the 20,000 steps mark again as well collapsed in our chairs at Coqueta for some much-needed carbohydrates.

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That may have also been partly the munchies, as it was on Mary’s very first day of SF sight-seeing that we encountered a confident hippie smoking his joint while standing next to 3 SFPD officers in the city, what I’m pretty sure was a crack-pipe just behind Fisherman’s Wharf while waiting for the train and of course, some weirdo tapping my shoulder while standing like sardines on the peak-hour train. #MarysLaw

Clearly weeks of carrying my oversized handbag chockfull of travel items has destroyed the nerve endings in my shoulder, as I didn’t notice said tapping. But if you ever want to know what a mother simultaneously channeling a heart attack and murderous rage looks like, Mary is your woman.

Thankfully some semblance of normality was restored when Natalie’s Multi-Time Zonal Festivities commenced. Over the 48 hours in which it was mandatory for my husband and my mother to be nice to me. Day One (Australian Eastern Standard Time Festivities) naturally necessitated a casual lunch & chats with rockstar chef Yotam Ottolenghi at the launch of his new book Nopi…

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Day Two (Pacific Time Festivities) was a stunning day of morning matcha in Japanese Tea Gardens, literally stopping to smell the roses in Golden Gate Park’s Rose Garden, visiting the Disney/Dali Exhibit in The Presidio, a stop via The Palace of Fine Arts and of course, a degustation dinner to round out the festivities. Ultimate #foodcoma.

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And while mum & I huddled on the couch for our final night’s food coma recovery & hugs, George carved pumpkins – affectionately named Filbert & Hugo, in anticipation of Halloween.

I can’t recall the last time I had 2 uninterrupted weeks with my mother, but if you ever get the chance, do it. If not for the fun, do it for the excessively high pedometer readings, selfies and memories.